March 10, 2019

Why I’m Never Going To Be THAT Blogger

Why I'm Never Going To Be THAT Blogger

I’ve had this blog post written in my head for quite some time. It’s sat in the ‘drafts’ section of my brain, building momentum and becoming almost complete without a word ever being typed. I’d put off writing it for several reasons and subsequently it changed direction once or twice too. But I’ve been unable to shake it – which is always a sign to myself that I need to do something about it.

As a blogger, an Instagrammer, a YouTuber, a content creator…an anything online ‘er’ I often feel this subliminal pull from within the industry to tick a box. To qualify for my place. So much gets said about inclusivity and exclusivity in the blogging world, it’s not exactly new news is it? But I’ve always rested fairly on these matters, or so I like to think. Rightly or wrongly, like any industry, when it comes to partnerships and collaborations there are going to be requirements on the people involved. For example, to look a certain way and be a certain size, shape or style. I know some people really struggle with this and try and fight the mold and shout out for change a lot. The truth is that brands absolutely should be more open eyed with regards to variation in the bloggers and influencers they work with. But the other side of the coin is that if they’re paying to work with someone, surely that buys them the right to chose? It’s a fine line and one I see both sides of.

I’m 31. I have two children and I don’t live in London. All of which I feel as a beauty blogger can be to my detriment. I’ve built my brand up to become my source of income and I’m incredibly proud of that.  But that said, I’m still thirty-one. I have wrinkles and eye bags and more cellulite than I like to think about. My body is the shape of someone who has given birth to two humans – it’s not perfectly proportioned. My cute waist and bum ratio is no longer in sync and doesn’t look the way it did 10 years ago. Neither do my legs with my calf muscles being wider than I’ve ever remembered. Honestly brutal over here right now, okay? I might be small (ish) framed but not how I used to be. And my weight can go between a size 10 and a size 14 in a matter of months depending on stress levels too.

But despite all this I’ve built a brand and a blogging space I’m proud of – seriously, bar having my children I think my blog is my biggest accomplishment. So I like to think that the brand partnerships I’ve had have always been based on built relationships, a good rapport and my professional attitude. Basically, I like to think that being a nice person has been a driving force in a lot of my work. And that’s where I want to be – I want to work with brands I have relationships with – the ones whose products I believe in and the ones who believe in me in return. Not just the ones who want to tick a box with their campaigns.

Like most bloggers, I have been drawn into many conversations where I ended up feeling inadequate as a content creator. I don’t get to London enough, I don’t look a certain way etc. And it made me feel rubbish and like I wasn’t good enough at times. But maybe it’s my age, or a bit more life experience, or the fact that I’m genuinely happy with myself as a person: but I’ve accepted I’m never going to be THAT blogger. I’m never going to be the blogger who gets booked for swish, slick trendy campaigns – because I don’t fit that bill. And you know what? I’m okay with that.

Why I'm Never Going To Be THAT Instagrammer

As a beauty blogger I like to create content that’s everyday – the stuff women and girls of all ages and styles can enjoy. I create what I know, what I’m comfortable with and what I like. I used to look at the Instagrammers who were uber tanned, made up like they were going on a night out all the time and never showing a bare face. But that’s just not me. I’m not THAT blogger. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that by the way.) I love make up and skincare -and basically anything beauty related, but maybe not in that traditional ‘Instagram’ way. I love a deep smokey eye and a red lip, I play with colours and experiment plenty but I’m never going to be dolled up to the nines every second of the day, without a hair out of place, lashes for miles and a face so heavy I can’t crack a smile. I love fake tanning, false lashes and lots of make up – but there’s  a limit for me. And maybe I’m just not Instagram-style level enough…

As a beauty blogger I’m about real-life make up styles: the stuff we can all do and enjoy. The relateable style that isn’t only for those who apply make up like a trained MUA. I used to get down when I saw others working with brands or being at events that were so ridiculously cool that my 15 year old self felt like an outsider all over again. But now I’m genuinely really happy with not being involved in those sorts of things all the time – I couldn’t do them justice anyway because I’m not THAT blogger. I’m about products that can be used everyday by everyday people and brands that want to reach the audience I talk to: the everyday girls and women. While that might mean I’ll never be photographed leaning on fancy cars in my underwear and getting paid for it, I’m okay with that. Because I’m happy with my style and happy with my style of content.

I think in this industry it’s far too easy to get sucked in and fall down a rabbit hole of thinking you should look, be or behave a certain way. If you want to be THAT blogger that’s great – I’m not criticising against it, but merely saying that’s not for me. In a community of people always so eager to pull others down for the slightest thing, I think we all NEED to be the people we truly are, and that goes for our content as well. There’s too much against bloggers these days that if you dress yourself up (proverbially speaking) to be a ‘fake’ version of yourself then at some point you’re in for some heartache. You need to be made of tough stuff in this industry and there’s no way of enduring it when you’re pretending to be someone else.

I’m okay with being the everyday beauty blogger.

Read more of my lifestyle posts here.

20 comments so far.

20 responses to “Why I’m Never Going To Be THAT Blogger”

  1. Boxnip says:

    I can definitely relate to this being 48yrs old, had 5 kids and am now disabled. As a beauty blogger I often feel completely obsolete. I am not THAT blogger either. It’s funny but most are my audience fall into either the 18-24 or 25-34 age brackets. It always surprises me to be honest. I mean, I guess it’s good I have such a young audience and it does reassure me that I must be doing something right. lol 😀

    Sarah 🌺 || Boxnip

  2. Mel says:

    I absolutely agree with this. It’s such a journey being part of this community and sometimes what we see can be hard not to compare ourselves to. Different things suit different people and we all need to find what’s right for ourselves.

  3. Laura says:

    You are the perfect example to show that you don’t need to be ‘that’ blogger to be successful! You have done so well and should be really proud! x

  4. I adore this! You’ve hit the nail on the head, but all of this is about our perception. We all think this is what sells/what brands want but half the time it’s completely different to reality. I often feel like I’m not on the right path, doing something different or pissing people off haha! But you’ve got to be you, because YOU are what people are here for and what sells.

    Keep being you!

  5. Elizabeth says:

    I’d much rather be true to myself and my readers than try to fit it a certain style. Readers can tell when you’re not being true. Keep up the good work and be who you are

  6. I’m feeling more and more like this recently. I think it’s why I needed to step back a little and re-evaluate what I was doing xx

  7. Rebecca Smith says:

    To be honest, I don’t care for many of the well known bloggers these days because they are all the same. Same places, restaurants, hotels, same style of posts etc. There’s no originality so actually, you are a breathe of fresh air for people like me. I live in London, and it’s quite nice to see bloggers mixing it up and posting about great places where they live, instead of the newest London hotspot. There’s a lot of bloggers I used to love that have now sold out and become the same old type of blogger. It’s nice to have a bit of variety, as well as people who are more genuine! Keep doing what you’re doing 🙂

  8. Erin says:

    I think you are incredible, but I know I am not even a good everyday blogger anymore, I barely wear makeup and I’ve not been to london in over 10 years. We are bloggers because we have blogs, don’t feel the need to fit a mould or fit in – I think you are awesome exactly the way you are.

    Erin || MakeErinOver

  9. Mykki says:

    As much as I agree with this, I feel like the aesthetic of your blog, your overall look and style, do still tick a lot of the basic beauty blogger checklists. But I recognize that it’s all a wide spectrum of blogging experiences.

    I’m not blonde. I’m not really pretty, so I don’t feel comfortable posting ANY photos of myself on my blog, I don’t have my own domain, and I’m awful at doing this affiliate marketing thing, because it feels like a cheap way to monetize something that was only ever meant to be a creative outlet…I feel this pressure to turn myself into a brand, and I don’t even LIKE myself.

    So it’s definitely hard not to play the comparison game when it seems like no one wants to read my unique content. The blogging sphere really does feel like an echo chamber these days, so thanks for writing this and drawing attention to that.

  10. ofbeautyand says:

    I barely watch/read anything from the ‘main’ beauty bloggers/youtubers – I prefer ‘real’ or more relatable bloggers x

  11. Can I admit something? You’re one of the few beauty bloggers that I trust, would take recommendations from and listen to their advice. You’re definitely doing something right and please don’t ever change to fit the mould!

    Jenny in Neverland

  12. Sarah says:

    I love this! Well done xx

  13. I love your content, and it is because you are real, relatable and not THAT blogger!

  14. I loe this post so much! I still feel like I’m not good enough of a content creator, but I’m just trying to do my thing and just do what makes me happy. I love what you do my darling, you’re so talented and never forget that.

  15. terriheckley says:

    I absolutely ADORE your content Chloe xx

  16. Alicia says:

    I can relate to this and I have felt like this before I’m slowly starting to get used to being myself online and not worrying about what category I fall in, It’s funny because I never thought you would have those faults your by far one of my faves! haha Also you look STUNNING in these pics!

    Alicia Xo

  17. I can totally relate to this! But honestly Chloe you’ve done AMAZING and you should be so proud of yourself! x

  18. boatmanadmin says:

    My most favourite bloggers are those that are just like me, trying to get a long in life, make an honest living and just ‘being’. There are so many that I’m finding are unrelatable that I’m unfollowing them x

  19. Zoey says:

    Love this! Can completely relate to you – I’m not going to be that blogger either.

    Zoey |

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Welcome to Lady Writes! The multi-award winning blog by Chloe Brewer and home of everyday beauty and lifestyle for the everyday woman.

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