Thursday, 11 June 2015

What DO Men Want?

So, if you read my previous post 'What DO Women Want' then you'll know that I'm trying to make it really easy to explain my thoughts on this confusing, perplexing and oftentimes, downright impossible-to-answer question.

As I've said before, as women, we are often told that we  are the difficult ones to figure out. (I like to think my previous post rubbished those accusations - in your face, men of the world!) So, while I was thinking about what women want, I also spent time deciphering what men want. And here's what I've come up with...

I know it's cheesy, and I hate the song, but men really do want "a lady in the street, but a freak in the bed". (Please don't hate me for quoting that). Men want the woman they can take home to meet their parents, the one who's classy, who doesn't show her ass cheeks and boobs on a night out. They want a girl with style, and grace, they want the girl who's beautiful - not the girl who's 'hot'. The sort of girl who's intelligent, confident but not cocky. Basically they want the Aubrey Heburn's of the world. Then on the flip side, they want their beautiful, classy girl to be an absolute game changer in the bedroom. Lets be honest,  men want a lady who can blow (pardon the pun) their mind in bed. Someone who will try new things, mix it up, take them by surprise, take the lead once in a while etc etc. Life's too short for boring sex after all.

Men also want the woman who's 'wifey material'. I know this overlaps with some of the above (in the classy category) but I will always remember asking my ex what it was about me that he loved, especially when so many other girl threw themselves at him. He told me it was because I was 'wifey material'. I know we don't live in the 50's, and we're all for equality and all that (yes, I appreciate that we get to vote) but some things shouldn't/don't change. I think men want the woman who's going to look after them. They want the woman who's going to do all she can to make him happy, even if that means cooking (sometimes) and cleaning. Even worse, it means ironing!  I think it's down to men being a bunch of mummies boys (I say this with affection, as I am the mother of a son). According to my ex, the definition of 'wifey material' is the girl you wouldn't take home to f*** but the girl you take the time to date first. So yes, I think they all want that deep down.

I also think that men want to be able to feel free. I have no idea why men have this opinion of relationships being like confinement! They seem to think "it pins them down" and that they can't ever have fun again. This drives me insane! I don't want a man to stop spending time with his friends, anymore than I would want to stop. The problem often occurs when men struggle to reign in their 'party boy' lifestyle, after all who wants a boyfriend who spends all weekend, every weekend either drunk or so hungover he's as much use as a chocolate teapot? Us trying to get some of their time, appears to them like we want all of their time, which isn't usually the case. So (I digress) men want a woman who lets them feel free enough to still spend time with their mates, go to football etc. However, they do want the security of a relationship, so this one is like asking Jack to give you his magic beans. It's a difficult one to balance, but with lots of clenched teeth, girlfriends to moan to and plenty of vino, it can be done and a balance can be achieved. It just takes time. I just think men like to think they can have it all (even when in reality they can't), so where's the harm in letting them believe that?
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